What is Cyberbullying?

Cyberbullying is an individual's use of technology to threaten, insult, tease, taunt, harass, or damage the reputation of another person. In online games this is often referred to as griefing. Some people reserve the term for web abuse that occurs between two minors; once adults become involved, the abuse is usually termed "cyber harrassment" or "cyberstalking." 1

Many people say things online that they would never dream of saying in real life. The somewhat artificial online environment can facilitate the posting of cruel and humiliating information about another person, and can make the exchange of vicious comments seem less serious than they actually are. Another factor that encourages cyberbullying is the fact that a cyberbully can hide behind the shield of online anonymity.

Some teens, such as Tyler Clementi, Megan Meier, and Ryan Halligan, committed suicide after being bullied online.

Common Forms of Cyberbullying

• A person pretends to be someone they are not while chatting online in order to trick, hurt, or embarrass someone else.

• Extremely personal or sensitive information about an individual is maliciously posted or distributed online.

• Lies, gossip, and rumors about an individual are maliciously posted or distributed online.

• An individual posts pictures of another person without that person's consent. These pictures are often altered from their originals and may even be pornographic.

• Cruel comments are exchanged back and forth through chat or email (these online altercations are often referred to as flame wars).

• A person threatens another person online. These threats may be vague ("I'm going to get you!") or frighteningly specific.

• An individual sends repeated "notify" or "report" messages to an ISP, chat room host, or online game. These flagging mechanisms, meant to help users report inappropriate web use, can be maliciously abused: by reporting a user repeatedly for no good reason, the victim's accounts or use of specific game sites can be restricted or completely denied. This method is sometimes referred to as "cyberbullying by proxy." 2

It's important to note that methods of cyberbullying vary from one age group to the next. Children in elementary school often focus on teasing and mean-spirited name calling, while older children and teens may enter into the more vicious realms of posting doctored photographs or telling overt lies. 3

Concerns for Parents

• Your child may be a victim of cyberbullying. Kids who are cyberbullied are at high risk for low self-esteem and depression, or even suicide. Teens like Tyler Clementi, Megan Meier, and Ryan Halligan are examples of the devastating consequences cyberbullying can have.

• Your child may be cyberbullying others. Studies have shown that kids who bully others show tendencies towards cruelty and violence later in life.

• One huge concern—whether your child is the bully or the one being bullied—is that information posted on the web can be viewed by anyone. Rumors, lies, and cruel or embarrassing remarks will be posted for virtually anyone to see. Further still, what is posted online never truly goes away. Cyberbullying could haunt your child for years to come.

How Can I Keep My Child Safe?

 

• Stress the importance of following the rules of Netiquette. Remind your kids that there are human beings with feelings, opinions, and emotions behind every email address and screen name. If you are courteous and respectful towards other web users, it's likely that they'll return the favor.

 

• Be sure your children understand the importance of reporting cyberbullying. Whether the abuse is directed at them or at someone else, this kind of bullying can be extremely damaging and becomes harder to resolve as time stretches on. Let them know that they can come to you, to a teacher, or to any other trusted adult if they find themselves victimized by a cyberbully. The sooner parents and adults can get involved, the sooner the cyberbullying can be stopped.

• Teach your kids to avoid environments where cyberbullying tends to start. Chat rooms, forums, and social networking sites like Facebook can be hotbeds for cyberbullying and flame wars. Decide what places on the web are and are not appropriate for your child, taking age, maturity, and any other important factors into consideration.

• Be sure your child isn't a cyberbully. Do not let your children post unkind comments, photos, or videos of anyone else. Be sure they know that this kind of behavior is absolutely unacceptable. Many public schools are teaching this message in special anti-bullying lessons or programs. Help these good efforts along by reinforcing these ideas at home.

• Monitor your child's web activity and make sure you have access to their online conversations or social networking profile pages. Be especially vigilant if your child is depressed, withdrawn, suffers from low self-esteem, or tends to form serious relationships with Facebook or MySpace friends. If you wish you can use monitoring programs on your computer; however often kids can get around these and there is no real substitute for open communication.

• Know the social networking tools your child is using. Sensitive information, often provides an easy target for a cyber bully. Social networking tools have settings to restrict access to a user's profile. Especially stress the importance of keeping personal and sensitive information offline. Once data any kind of data has been sent, whether it is pictures, messages, or anything else, that data cannot be deleted or stopped by the sender. Immediately report any inappropriate or abusive activity to the social networking site. Social networking sites review complaints, and promptly address the issue.

Cyberbullying Statistics

Cyberbullying incidents seem to be increasing, not decreasing. Here are some unsettling numbers from recent studies and surveys:

• 58% of kids admit someone has said mean or hurtful things to them online. More than 4 out of 10 say it has happened more than once. 4

• 53% of kids admit having said something mean or hurtful to another person online. More than 1 in 3 have done it more than once. 5

• 58% of kids have not told their parents or an adult about something mean or hurtful that happened to them online. 6

• 40% of kids have had their password(s) stolen and changed by a bully. 7

• Cyberbullying victims are eight times more likely to report carrying a weapon to school in the last 30 days than non-bullied teens. 8

• Cyberbullying has led to at least four documented cases of teen suicide in the United States. 9

• Only 15% of parents polled knew what cyberbullying was. 10

Where Can I Learn More?

Read some of the stories of kids affected by cyberbulling, like Tyler Clementi, Megan Meier, Ryan Halligan, Jessi Slaughter, or Casey Haynes.

Read our guest blog post by Ken Shallcross, Protection from Internet Dangers.

Read our guest blog post from Judge Tom Jacobs, Cyber-Tips from a Juvenile Court Judge.

Listen to our podcast with Bill Belsey of Cyberbullying.org

Read some of our newswire reports on cyberbullying:

• MTV releases tool to fight cyberbullying
• President Obama's message about bullying and cyberbullying
• US Regulator requires cyberbullying prevention be taught in schools
• What parents can do about cyberbullying

Check out our list of books about cyberbullying or our list of organizations that fight against cyberbullying.

Read this article about the warning signs of cyberbullying. Another great article from the same site highlights the potential tragedies cyberbullying may bring about and presents some sobering statistics about the prevalence of cyberbullying among kids and teens today.